This is not the update I wanted to make. I write this with tears in my eyes so I apologize for any typos. 

Despite his second surgery being successful and there being a lot of hope for things starting to look up, last night my sweet boy ran out of the strength to fight. His heart stopped and I watched them spend 10 minutes resuscitating him. I had to make the very hard decision to keep putting him through this or to let him go. I want nothing more than to have him here in this world with me but I couldn't ask him to go through any more. I sat with him as his heart faded away. I held his paw and pet his head. I told him I loved him and that he was a good boy. My sweet snuggly boy. They took him to a room and let me have as much time with him as I needed. Brian brought our other dog Abby so she could see him one last time. I wanted her to know where Tank went and what happened so she would understand why he isn't coming home. They grew up together. They say it helps dogs to see the body of those who pass so that they can understand and grieve. We said our final goodbyes. We went home and I crashed as I've gotten about 8 hours of sleep total this entire week.

I was looking forward to the next update being me bringing him home. I had everything ready for him for the next stage of him getting lots of rest and healing. I'm beyond devastated. 

That's the update but I have so much more to say about Tank. 

I grapple with the thought of people who will say, "It's just a dog." Everyone's entitled to their opinion. That particular opinion is not one I share. 

Tank was by my side during one of, if not the most, difficult periods in my life. I went the better part of a year essentially disabled, one step above being full blown bed bound. My boyfriend was working 6+ days a week and was only able to be home for a few hours on the weekend. In a time when I needed someone by my side the most I had to go it alone. I faced extreme isolation since he was the only human contact I had during that entire time. They don't even put the worst prisoners' through the levels of isolation I endured. The only thing that kept me going and helped me maintain my sanity were my dogs. Tank was always by my side helping to stave off the loneliness. I always called him my sweet snuggly boy. He never left my side. He was a major part of what got me through that period in my life. Its true what they say, that dogs are angels on Earth.

Tank was my angel during that time and yesterday my angel gained his wings. I did everything I could to save his life. I exhausted every resource I had. His medical team went above and beyond. They were heart broken too. I want to thank everyone who's supported me, who kept him in their thoughts, prayed for him, and donated. I still have a mountain of medical bills. When the call came that he needed the second surgery to have a chance I had to make a decision right then and there. I decided I would give him every chance available to him so I told the team lets save him. Any donations from here on out are greatly appreciated and will go towards what I owe for giving him that chance.

My only regret is every moment I could have spent giving him love that was wasted on menial things. Tomorrow is never guaranteed. Life is a gift, a very precious gift. Cherish every moment God gives you with the ones you love, be it family, friends and pets.  

Tank survived his second surgery. Right before they were about to begin his heart stopped but they were able to bring him back and continue forward. He’s stable and resting. He needs all the love and prayers now more than ever. Let this be the end of this ordeal so he can start healing. The next few days will be critical. I’m still figuring out how I’m going to cover all the costs but more importantly he’s still alive and has a fighting chance. Thank you to everyone who’s given their support by sharing, donating and praying for Tank. You all are life actual life savers. From the bottom of my heart, thank you.

The surgeon just met with me. They’re taking him and starting now. The surgeon thinks the best chance he has is now and he won’t get any stronger the longer we wait. Please pray for Tank. Pray for miracle. 🙏

Back at the ER. He was touch and go over the night but they’ve got him stabilized. We’re working towards getting him to where they feel safe going in for the second surgery. I remain hopeful. This boy still has so much life left in him. Please keep praying for him. Everything truly does help. God bless 🙏

Spent tonight with him while they get him stabilized. Told him he’s a good boy and that we love him very much. Told him he can pull through and that the doctors will do everything they can for him. He opened his eyes and even seemed like he wanted to climb into my lap. Poor thing is so exhausted. Please keep him in your prayers.

Went back home to grab some things and try to get in a nap. Headed back soon.